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" It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value. "
Arthur C. Clarke
Intelligence
Funny
Survival
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" I'll stick to finding the funny in the ordinary because my life is pretty ordinary and so are the lives of my friends - and my friends are hilarious. "
Issa Rae
Finding
My Life
Life
" Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die. "
Mel Brooks
Tragedy
You
Die
" If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving. "
Henny Youngman
Funny
First
You
" If my life wasn't funny, it would just be true, and that's unacceptable. "
Carrie Fisher
True
Be True
My Life
" Because death and illness are the most horrible things in life, of course that's where the most absurdly funny things are going to happen. "
Julia Sweeney
Life
Happen
Going
" You are not just a funny person or just a journalist. Most people are hybrids of having a smart opinion and a great sense of humor. "
Katie Nolan
People
Funny
Humor
" One man is as good as another until he has written a book. "
Benjamin Jowett
Man
He
Funny
" A lot of people who claim they're political comedians are just comedians who have opinions. But they stop being funny the minute they give their opinions. "
Gilbert Gottfried
Political
Stop
People
" I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle. "
Mitch Hedberg
Whistle
Because
Funny
" I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing. "
Johnny Carson
Funny
Kid
Used
" I don't write material. Funny things happen to me in the course of a day, and I just make notes. "
Kevin Hart
Funny
Happen
Me
" When I was a kid, I never did funny things to get attention. I was never a funny person. I was never, like, 'Oh, wow. I could say this some day on stage.' "
Steven Wright
Say
Attention
Day
" Prejudice is a great time saver. You can form opinions without having to get the facts. "
E. B. White
Facts
Funny
Great
" I don't pretend we have all the answers. But the questions are certainly worth thinking about. "
Arthur C. Clarke
Thinking
Knowledge
Questions
" At the end of the day it's got to be a good movie, it's got to be a funny movie, and it's got to make people think, 'Hey, I couldn't have spent my time any better.' "
Tom Hanks
Think
Good
People
" I think being funny is not anyone's first choice. "
Woody Allen
Humor
Funny
Think
" I never thought of myself as like, a funny person. "
Lena Dunham
Thought
Person
Never
" The surprising thing is that I was not funny in high school. I was always jealous of the funny kids because they always got the girls. I couldn't tell a joke to save my life. "
Seann William Scott
Jealous
Life
My Life
" I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat. "
Will Rogers
Funny
Political Party
Political
" I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again. "
Joan Rivers
Over
Hate
Again
" We are all born mad. Some remain so. "
Samuel Beckett
Mad
Remain
Some
" When God sneezed, I didn't know what to say. "
Henny Youngman
Funny
Say
God
" I get tired of comedies where there are a bunch of funny guys and a beautiful woman who doesn't do anything funny. And I don't like books where there's a rough-and-tumble boy and a really clever, snotty girl. That's just not my experience with teenagers. "
Patrick Ness
Woman
Tired
Girl
" When I turned about 12 or 13, I realised that being funny wasn't about remembering jokes. It was about creating them. "
Paul Merton
Creating
Remembering
Funny
" There's only one true superpower amongst human beings, and that is being funny. People treat you differently if you can make them laugh. "
Jeff Garlin
True
People
Treat
" God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny. "
Garrison Keillor
Know
God
Play
" I used to work at NASA in Virginia. It was nothing glamorous; I was just tasked with making code compile for obscure projects, and I wasn't very good at it. Now I spend most of my time drawing pictures and looking at funny things on the Internet, which in retrospect is largely what I did at my old job, too. "
Randall Munroe
Time
Funny
Good
" What was funny if you were there is that we were all immensely sophisticated people who knew exactly what she was going to say and we're chatting away, nice to see you. "
Anthony Holden
Nice
You
She
" Well, I'm not afraid to say something if I think it's funny, even if it's harsh or racist. "
Sarah Silverman
I Think
Say
Think
" One man's folly is another man's wife. "
Helen Rowland
Wife
Man
Funny